Marry Someone Resourceful

I have been married for just over a year and I think it’s time I offer some marriage advice to my readers. Marry someone resourceful, someone who is more resourceful than you.
This piece of advice comes after a week of battling frigid temperatures with a struggling furnace. We have a new furnace that, as it turns out, wasn’t installed correctly. I don’t know how warm it is where you are but in Pittsburgh it has basically been a frozen tundra for the last week, with no immediate end in sight.
A few days ago I woke up and felt cold. Even before I threw off my covers I knew something was wrong. Sure enough, it was only 57 degrees in the house (and a balmy 3 outside.) The furnace had stopped working properly during the night.
I’ll spare you the details of what was wrong, mostly because I don’t know them, but the furnace itself was fine. It turns out the pipes weren’t installed correctly so water and ice were building up, the furnace was shutting down too soon, and well, we were cold.
So anyway, back to my marriage advice. Marry someone more resourceful than you. My husband was able to diagnose the problem, resolve it, troubleshoot it again when a similar error happened, and fix it again. Not only did he keep us from freezing, he saved us a lot of money and grief from having to call the repair company.
Now, I’m resourceful. I’m perfectly capable of troubleshooting issues when they occur. I can research on the internet and use my life experience to try to figure out what happened, if I can fix it, and what steps to take next. However, I have no patience for or interest in understanding the minutia and physics of the pipes of my furnace that I paid a lot of money for a professional to install.
The reality is, if it were up to me, I would have called the HVAC company, paid $100 for a service call, and been angry for the rest of the week. Instead, I’m cozy, warm, happy, and still have that $100 in my pocket. All because I married someone more resourceful than me.
This wasn’t the first time I’ve been impressed with his resourcefulness. He has fixed plumbing issues for us, changed the belt in my car, moved our fence, and rewired our electric box. One day he buried a dead baby bunny we found in our backyard…after he tried to save its life.
He built our dining room table.

I’m not saying he can do it all, but he is always willing to try and usually, he succeeds.
I highly recommend you marry someone more resourceful than you, no matter how resourceful you are. You won’t be sorry and you’ll always be warm.



  1. Cara on January 4, 2018 at 8:48 am

    Years ago, a post like this would have sent me into a tailspin because I grew up with a resourceful father. My husband grew up with a resourceful father. But my husband? Much to my (early) dismay, he is not resourceful. This came as a shock to me when we got our first house and I was the one wielding the paintbrush, the crowbar and the hammer. Over the years I have tried to make him resourceful, and finally, I made the decision to appreciate the different kind of resourcefulness: the kind that is willing to say “I am willing to throw money at this problem to make it go away”. And when I don’t want to throw money at it? That’s when I know it’s my turn to be the resourceful one. So today, reading this, the jealousy I feel isn’t that your married someone with those kinds of resources, but rather that I don’t have that resourcefulness myself!

  2. Beth on January 4, 2018 at 10:58 am

    I lean on my husband for a lot and I’m not ashamed, lol. I’m a feminist and I believe women can do anything and if I had to, I could do things around the house, but my husband is very handy and I’m not going to complain about letting him do things! LOL

  3. Laura on January 4, 2018 at 11:58 am

    He is amazing!! I’ll add something there too – marry someone who is willing to experiment AND learn. I’ll always be grateful that my dad was able to work with my husband on two of our bathrooms. I’ll never forget my dad’s face when he realized that the previous owners had not used boxes to install lights and the wires were just coming out from the wall. The husband had always been leery of electric work, but dad worked with him and helped him do it – and now he’s installed many lights! Lessons passed on to another generation. 🙂

  4. Kim on January 4, 2018 at 1:25 pm

    My husband and I always joke that I wear the pants in the relationship. Well the tool belt anyways. Hes and amazing provider but like you would rather just pay someone. LOL . Glad he got it fixed for ya! Stay inside and warm!!

  5. Maggie on January 4, 2018 at 1:52 pm

    Thank goodness for your hubby! I’m much the same way with Jim when it comes to that stuff – I grew up in a house with electric base-board heating, and would not even know where to start beyond calling the gas company! (Also your dining room is super cute.)

    • Courtney A. Casto on January 5, 2018 at 5:25 pm

      I wouldn’t know where to start either! Thanks, it’s a cozy room that we don’t use much. I put my grandmother’s dishes out on the table my husband made and it makes me happy. 🙂

  6. Charlotte on January 4, 2018 at 3:43 pm

    Awww what a lovely post—and so very true. Bryan is unbelievably handy and resourceful which I will surely appreciate when we purchase a home later this year. All those expenses add up after a while!! Glad you are staying warm, that your furnace is working again. Also your hubby built a gorgeous dining room table!!

    • Courtney A. Casto on January 5, 2018 at 5:28 pm

      Having a handy partner is super helpful when you own a house. It’s 2 degrees here right now so I’m glad it’s working too! Thanks Charlotte, I love that he built our table. 🙂

  7. Lecy | A Simpler Grace on January 5, 2018 at 12:42 am

    I love this! I think it’s important to find someone who counterbalances your own positive traits and skills with their own. You know it’s a good match when they can do the things you aren’t able to. 🙂

  8. San on January 5, 2018 at 4:05 pm

    Well, in my case, my husband married the resourceful person because I am much more hands-on and “let’s fix this” than he is… but he’s good in other areas and so I see it as balancing each other out 🙂

    • Courtney A. Casto on January 5, 2018 at 5:22 pm

      Your husband is a smart man! It’s helpful when your strengths balance each other!

  9. Kim @ The ReInVintaged Life on January 7, 2018 at 12:42 am

    This is such good advice! Of course, I don’t plan on getting married again anytime soon (if ever. but that still doesn’t stop me from watching Say Yes to the Dress without fail), so I am trying to become much more resourceful myself. I’m sure it’s not as cold here in Alabama as it is in Pennsylvania, but for the kinds of winters we’re used to (very mild, with intermittent snow every few years), it’s basically been a frozen tundra here, too. Hope it thaws out soon!

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