Let’s Talk About Summer

Let’s talk about summer. I don’t understand why each year everyone welcomes summer like it’s a long lost friend returning home with champagne and diamonds. I certainly don’t. I pull up my welcome mat, close the windows, and plant myself in front of the air conditioner until I see school buses again. Summer is hot, I have to work, and summer vacation hasn’t been part of my life for a long time. So, I don’t get why we roll out the red carpet for summer. I’d prefer a road closed sign that detours that sucker to another hemisphere.
Ok, I’ll be honest. I’m grumpier than my normal grumpy during summer and it’s not just because of the heat, though it’s certainly a contributing factor. I’m jealous. I’m so freaking jealous of people who have their summers off and don’t have to work that I can actually feel the jealousy well up inside of me towards the end of spring. The countdowns to the end of the work or school year start showing up on social media. Enthusiastic plans for vacation and lazy summer days start to fill conversations. Last day of school pictures flood my news feeds. And then? Then it hits. The vacations, the pictures of people sitting by the pool, the middle of the day manicures, the blog posts about how wonderful it is to have time away from work to relax after a busy year.
You know what I’m doing this summer? The same thing I did during Fall. And Winter. And Spring. Working. Trying to relax on the weekend and not think about work, then working some more. So yeah, I’m jealous. Really jealous. I know it’s mostly teachers who have the luxury of summers off. I know they do important things and work hard and I’m not saying they don’t deserve a break. It’s just that I do too and it’s not an option for me. Unless I change careers or win the lottery it’s never going to be an option for me. There are days I struggle to accept that life truth and most of those days are in the summer.
You want to know what my real truth is about summer? I JUST WANT SOME TIME. I want some time to just be me. I want a few months of my own life to live, without worrying about work. And the added luxury of knowing my job is waiting for me come fall? Wow. I cannot tell you the amount of relief from stress and anxiety that would give me, even just for one summer.
Just one.
Ah, it feels good to get that OUT. I know, I know. I’m a grump. A summer grump. And I know there are some changes I could make to my life to not be such a summer grump, but this blog post isn’t about making changes. It’s about being grumpy and acknowledging that I’m really, really, stinking jealous. So summer, you can leave the champagne at the door. I’ll chill it and pop the cork when I see the first leaf fall.


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